Moon’s Fifth Night – Mana-sama’s Birthday Party

•March 8, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Wanna know all about the Moon’s Fifth Night, A.K.A Mana-sama’s Birthday Party?

You can read it here! Pics included!


I’ve Moved!

•July 9, 2008 • 1 Comment

Flight of Fancy has moved to its own server!

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Manikako at The Podium

•February 25, 2008 • 3 Comments

I’ve mentioned before, somewhere in this blog, that I’m very fond of ball-jointed dolls, especially those made by Dream of Doll. My friend, Jen, informed me two weeks ago about this fund-raising activity at The Podium where dolls are going to be exhibited and members from ManikaManila, an organization of BJD owners in the Philippines, are going to be volunteering. I said, Wow, cool! Maybe a ManikaManila member will bring her Dream of Doll BJD! We went on the first day of the event and…

To continue reading this post, click here.

Flight of Fancy has moved to its own server!

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My angst…

•February 16, 2008 • 1 Comment

I told myself that I won’t be like all the other women in love stories and soap operas whose lives fell into pieces the moment they meet the “love of their life.” This love who has proved to be naive, inconsiderate, cold and short-tempered.

But then again, how did those stories end? Wasn’t theirs a happy one? Or did I just imagine it?

Apparently, most of the women born in this world are bound to such fate. For them to be destroyed by some loser and be reborn from the ashes like the phoenix in all its glory and radiance.

But I didn’t say that the phoenix can’t be killed. But it has an amazing ability to be reborn again and again.


This paragraph has been edited as it contains NOT pure hatred, but hatred nonetheless. It kinda sounded cheesy as it got longer.



My Dad told me, as I was crying my eyes out at Shakey’s 2 days before Christmas, “A slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.” I’ve somehow blamed myself that I pushed you to hate me because I spoke of many useless words that didn’t help our situation. I was sad and lonely, lost and longing, abandoned and jealous. I felt ill to the guts. And I said, “You don’t have power over me anymore.” I ate my words too soon. I found myself fallen into depression as Christmas approached. They say, “Hell hath no wrath like a woman scorned.” You scorned me. But I didn’t want to let go of you yet. Not like that. Not while we’re miles apart. Not with that bitch for your neighbor.

Today, we had an argument. You were working and didn’t want to be disturb. But I just asked how you were doing, didn’t I? I showed concerned for your selfish ass, didn’t I? But you brushed me off like a paid whore.

Hear my words when I say, I DON”T WANT TO BE TREATED THAT WAY. That you’ll just be nice to me WHEN YOU WANT TO and I CAN’T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. That’s a fucked up life. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT if you don’t want me to get fed up about all these. Yes, I ALSO get FED UP. I WILL GET ANGRY WHEN I WANT TO and if getting ANGRY too will be your ANSWER then, FUCK YOU. Yes, I’M SCARED that YOU”LL GET ANGRY AGAIN the way you did this CHRISTMAS, but I WILL NOT lose my IDENTITY just so I could get to YOUR GOOD SIDE. I LOVE YOU, but I’M NOT YOUR TOY. I WANT TO RESPECTED AS THE PERSON I AM.

I don’t want to be my Mom… obedient and silent. You’re becoming more like your Mom… cold and indifferent.

P.S. I’m scared for the mere fact that you’ll read this post and get mad… It’s so sad that I’ve come to feel like this about you…

My depression…

•February 4, 2008 • Leave a Comment

The song playing is “Way Back Into Love” … I hear Drew singing “I’ve been living with a shadow overhead. I’ve been sleeping with a cloud above my bed. I’ve been lonely for so long.Trapped in the past, I just can’t seem to move on…”

Exactly what I am feeling…

Last night, like many other nights, I was hunted by my past… A past that I wished have never happened… If I could turn back time, I will be there to stop it… I would get there, no matter how far, no matter how difficult, no matter the cost… If I could have prevented you from liking somebody else… So I can be the one who made you smile and laugh… to be the one you hang out with… the one you talk to when you couldn’t sleep… the one you share your excitement with… the one you share your cooking with… the one you go to work with… the one you share your ideas and jokes with… sing karaoke until the morning… chat with until the sunrise… write to… care about if I smile or not… sleep on my carpet… to be the ONLY ONE…

I never expected that of all the people that you have to be with, she’s the one whom you’ve taken a liking to… I was most comfortable with her around… I was wrong… I know now that physical appearance is not your thing… It’s what makes you happy… It was her carefree character… her audacity and being dynamic… and energetic towards life…

I knew that at that time, I couldn’t be the person she was… because I was missing a part of myself… we were miles apart… I just couldn’t be the same… I couldn’t smile or laugh in the same way when you’re around… I couldn’t go to places cause familiar places remind me of you… and new places, I want to share that excitement with you…

But you tell me, “Life shouldn’t stop for you and me…”

God knows the countless night I’ve cried…staring at my monitor…waiting for you to go online… just to see your face…to hear your voice… I would wait and wait… Not caring about the hours that pass by, nor the strain in my eyes, nor the tiredness of my body… Like the goal of my living was to see you every night, and the misery I felt will only end the moment I hear the sound of Wengo Phone ringing…

Torture… That’s what it was…

Tears are flowing… My wounds are still open… Maybe I should stop for tonight…

Shopping in Moi-même-Moitié, Shinjuku

•January 26, 2008 • 7 Comments

Last December 28 to January 7 was the most exciting, fun-filled, and interesting 11 days of my life. I spent 6 unforgettable days in Osaka and 5 days in Tokyo, Japan with my SO.

January 2, my first shopping experience in Mana-sama’s boutique located in the 5th floor of Maruichi (0101) near the West Entrance of Shinjuku Station.



When I got to the 5th floor, I was kinda disappointed because the space still looked like I was still in a department store as opposed to private enclosed spaces which boutiques ought to be. I was expecting that Mana-sama’s boutique was supposed to be wonderful. So I turned left from the escalator, I already saw h.Naoto, but still no sign of Moi-même-Moitié, but then, near the end of the hallway, there it was, an old European-fortress-inspired entrance to a gothic sanctuary, Moi-même-Moitié!

I then took out my camera to take a picture of the entrance, and then a lady from the department store came to me and told me that taking pictures was prohibited. But she was too late, I’ve already stolen a shot. Apparently, there was really a sign on the entrance, but I wasn’t able to notice it because I was so excited. You can’t really blame me… So, I’m not gonna put up the pic here because I respect Mana-sama and if he says “no pictures,” I’ll have to obey that with all my heart… (as cheesy as that may have sounded, I don’t give a damn!)

His store is the coolest boutique ever! It was very warm inside, I had to take off my jacket. I took a look around and I’ve noticed that the attendants were really quiet, in fact the entire boutique was really quiet. Not that I have any problem with it. Then I saw this one piece that looked absolutely nice and decided to try it on. I had my SO talk to the attendant in Japanese because my Japanese wasn’t that fluent and I didn’t want to stress myself with the language, I was just thinking of all the very beautiful clothes around me! Then I was shown to the fitting room by this girl, 石井さん (looked at her name tag), who was very friendly by the way, (well, most Japanese are, especially to customers) which was at the center of the boutique and guess what! Their dressing room was a coffin! Very nice! I was very thrilled just by trying on a dress! Haha! Who would have known!

I was also kinda worried at the time when I was fitting the dress because Moi-même-Moitié clothing only comes in one size (M), but I was very happy to know that the dress fitted me perfectly.I felt like I was trying on my bridal gown or something. I also tried on a skirt, but I ended up buying the one piece and a pair of socks. At the counter, I had my purchase gift-wrapped and I was given a Moi-même-Moitié point card, which has 20 stamp slots to fill in. To get one stamp, you have to purchase 10,000yen worth of items (not including items on sale). After completing the point card, you get a gift! Yey!I wonder what gift is worth 200,00 yen of Moi-même-Moitié stuff?

I went back to the store the next day to buy another pair of socks, a pair of lace gloves, and a choker. More items, more points! Yes, I’m an obsessive-compulsive point collector!!! WARNING: Moi-même-Moitié will drain your pant pockets! But Moi-même-Moitié really does have lovely dresses and the craftsmanship is superb. Definitely the couture of Gothic Lolita fashion.

My SO who doesn’t really go for Gothic Lolita fashion was even mesmerized by everything that Moi-même-Moitié has to offer, from the feel of the place to the clothing and accessories they sell. If you’re really into Gothic Lolita / Aristocrat clothing and want the best the world has to offer, there’s nowhere to go but here.

If you have time in your hands, please do visit Moi-même-Moitié. You’ll find that you just can’t leave the store without buying anything. The other branch is in Hiroshima. I’d like to go visit the place sometime.

Hail Mana for creating Moi-même-Moitié!!!




Today’s Upper Prescription

•December 1, 2007 • Leave a Comment

Drug: Filth in the Beauty

Manufactured by: The GazettE

Dosage: When you’re losing (or have already lost) it and you wanna let it all out without hurting anybody. Perfect for schizos.

After Effects: F*****g hard rock!!! Yeah, growl baby… No need to understand what I’m saying… Just go with the rhythm till your heart pumps to the sound of the drums… Feel as I suck out the destruction from your shivering body… Sway your body from left to right… Move your head in circles… Come to me, only I can rescue you…